Ahoy Matey!

For the last several weeks, Yduj and I have been vacationing in Vermont.  I believe it is known as the, “Live Free or Die” state.  If I could have found a suggestion box on Route 9, I’d have offered that it might be changed to something more like the, “Bundle Up and Take Your Umbrella” state.  Oh, did I mention, it was cold and wet much of the time?

There were a number of sporty things Yduj and I had intended to do together.  To that end, we brought along our bikes, tennis rackets and bathing suits.  Unfortunately, we had hardly any use for any of these.   Have I mentioned . . . the weather sucked.

But one other thing we brought along did pay off.  Just prior to leaving, I bought an inflatable two person kayak to bring with us.  I should mention, I’d never been in a kayak before but in the spirit of trying to expand my ever-shrinking universe I took a plunge (groan here).

Any Port in a Storm

Any Port in a Storm

We had just  a number of days where the weather cooperated enough for us to take the boat on to one of the nearby lakes.  Although I was a little apprehensive about having to contort my body to get into the kayak without either upending it or looking incredibly foolish, I did pretty well.  In fact, I took to it like a duck to water (another groan here–but louder).  So much so, that I starting using nautical jargon wherever we went and whatever we were doing. When we went out to eat, I insisted on sitting on the starboard side of the table; I used every opportunity to invoke, “bow” or “stern”; sometimes, I would announce  that I had to visit the “head”; and regrettably,  I took to calling Yduj, “Captain”.  (This, it appears, is not a turn-on in bed.  Who knew?)

We both became very fond of our kayak.  So much so, that we decided to give her a name.  So we bought a bottle of champagne with the intent of christening her.  This was more than a little optimistic on our part.  Have you ever tried breaking a bottle on a rubber boat?  Let me save you the trouble.  Don’t even try. . . it can’t be done.  You can try smashing it on the bow, the stern, the beam, the skeg, or anywhere, and you’ll get nothing but frustrated.

So for now,our kayak remains unnamed.  Although, when I’m alone with her and no one can hear, I like to call her, Palindrome.





breaking bottle on bow.


2 Responses to “Ahoy Matey!”

  1. yduj Says:

    frustrated with the champagne bottle…
    ….how about trying to row in the grass…
    while thinking …

    try it backwards..!

  2. iron(ic)man triathlon Says:

    i tried rowing backwards. nothing happened.

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