“Star Light, Star Bright, First Starbucks I See Tonight….”

I have a big problem.  It might not be one for you, but it is for me.  I’m in the throes of a huge dilemma.  You see, for my birthday,  the folks at  Starbucks have given me a coupon for a free drink.  Any drink I want.  Which is part of the  problem.  Most days, I get a small coffee ($1.90) at my local branch.  Ordinarily, I carefully time my trip there to coincide with the nap times of the several million babies living here.  This way I’m able to avoid stroller shin (use your imagination).  In any event, even though I don’t much care for the fancy drinks that Starbucks offers, the Jew in me certainly isn’t going to use my drink coupon to save a measly $1.90–not when there are $5.95 drinks out there. (This, by the way, is why I have 53 pairs of pants from Banana Republic; I’ll go in for a pair of socks and see a 40% off sale on any one purchase.  And 40% off of $90.00 is sooo much more than a few bucks off some socks. I’d bet anything that these promotions are devised by Israelis.)  

But back to the free drink.  I decided to spend a few hours at Starbucks studying the menu of drinks and listening to other customers placing orders for complex concoctions that I hope might drive up the price.  All the while, trying to avoid detection by the baristas who might take me for a coffee terrorist.  I then returned to the office to go over my pronunciations of the coffee nomenclature with Luap and Giarc.  “Latte”, I had down; the same for “Frappacino.” “Mochiata,” needed just a little touch up.  But it’s the “Chai” that really gives me trouble.  It keeps coming out with a hard “ch” like the Hebrew letter.  Old (Jewish) habits die hard. 

But now, with my near perfect pronunciation in hand, I’m almost ready to go in and order a “Vente double chocolate full caf/half-caf  soy frappacino with a shot of tazo tea” which,  to be honest, doesn’t really appeal to me.  But what choice do I have?  It has occurred to me that I could try to intercept one of the  kids who frequent the place after school and try to sell my “free”  drink.  I’m not suggesting that I’d “scalp” the coupon …just sell it for the  face value (plus handling charges) of whatever drink the eight year old wants to get. There’s a certain appeal to this idea.  It would be good for both of us. I’d be cashing in …and she could get a free civics lesson in coffee capitalism run amok.

Looks expensive!


3 Responses to ““Star Light, Star Bright, First Starbucks I See Tonight….””

  1. RB Says:

    I do the same thing with my fequent flyer card at the local fro yo place. Ancient traits die hard.

  2. iron(ic)man triathlon Says:

    rich.. have no idea what you’re talking about. i’m a little worried. but still…nice to hear fro yo

  3. Mike McPartland Says:

    I’ll never have this problem. I get my healthful green tea and oatmeal with the other 99 percenters occupying Dunkin’ Donuts. And with my senior citizens discount, it costs me less there than a hoity-toity coffee at Starbucks.

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