Super Bowl Someday

A few days after the Super Bowl, I was driving with my friend Kram who asked what I had thought of the game.  I told him that I hadn’t watched it…..in fact, had not watched the Super Bowl in a decade or more.  After making a few jokes aimed at my masculinity, he told me that he had lost a bet on the game’s outcome.  He added that in spite of  that,  he had still won some money because he’d made a few other successful bets having to do with the game.  When I asked what he meant, Kram told me that one of the other bets he had made had to do with the outcome of the coin toss….that’s right, the coin toss to start the game.  Apparently, what is essentially, throughout time, a 50/50 chance is something that gets the betting juices going.  (FYI, the betting sites will require a bet of $102 to make $100 if you choose “heads”….but they’ll give you even odds on choosing “tails”. ) This, I found fascinating.  I’m not much of a gambler but I suggested that maybe we stop the car,  get out  and start betting on flips of a  coin…sans Super Bowl.  Kram wasn’t interested.  I then  offered to bet Kram $100 on the chances I would take a shit have a bowel movement that evening.  He looked at me a little strangely and didn’t respond. 

But back to the Super Bowl.  I’m not sure if my lack of interest in the game  is a “thing”, or I really don’t care.  That’s not true…I really just don’t care.  But I do  kind of get off on having that kind of idiosyncrasy as  part of my biography.  I like to  hold myself above the commoness of the event…..as if there are way more important ways I have  to spend my time.  But the truth is, I’m not using that time to read  Moby Dick or any of the great works or even do something else high-minded.  I guess it’s just become a thing.

I have a friend whose son-in-law has never eaten a peach or an apple or has  ever tasted peanut butter.  And this is just the tip of the iceberg.   He’s a very nice guy and when I met him I felt very comfortable asking him about these missing parts of his resume.  He explained that he was a very fussy eater while growing up and although he  could  easily see himself  trying these things now, he thought that having this “thing” was more important, fun and interesting than seeing what a peach tasted like.  He likes his uniqueness.  We probably all do. 

Obviously, I too, have some of that.  In addition to the Super Bowl weirdness,  I also have never seen the Wizard of Oz.  My mother tried to take me (twice) when I was young and I found it too scary and made her take me, my brother and sister home.  I know I could make it through the whole movie now (I think) but why would I do that?  Everyone has seen that movie.   Which leads me to the crown jewel in my eccentricity.  And, please remember…this is just between us.  Here it is: I’ve never seen  Psycho.   Never seen the motel scene, never saw the crazy Anthony Perkins character…nothing.  Scary films and I have never gotten along.  So much so, that it has been pretty easy not to see that movie.  And now, it’s such a cool thing to have not seen  it,  I’d be crazy –even crazier than that Bates guy — to see it now.   And after all, what are the odds that there’s someone out there of a certain age  who has never seen either the Wizard of Oz or Psycho.  Maybe Kram would like to make a bet on that.

 

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3 Responses to “Super Bowl Someday”

  1. Kitty Says:

    Ok, I have SO much to say about this, that I believe its best reserved for in person. Maybe at next year’s superbowl party.

  2. other jane Says:

    Neil,
    fwiw. I too was led out of the wizard of oz because I was terrified and I wouldn’t go near Psycho with a ten—-.
    But I liked watching the Super Bowl, not because I cared who won (although by the end of the game I cared a lot) but because it was a fabulous football game.
    and I don’t like peanut butter.
    This doesn’t seem to have much of a point, does it?

  3. iron(ic)man triathlon Says:

    re: you wouldn’t go near ‘psycho’ with a ten foot….; always reminds me of an ed wynn joke…he invented an eleven foot pole for just those occasions.

    always nice to hear form ‘the other jane’. btw…not ‘liking’ peanut butter and NEVER having eaten it are horses of different colors (just wanted to keep the metaphor thing going)

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