“Is This Any Way to Run An Airline?”

As you may have noticed,  I’ve stopped writing about my office and the people who work there.  There was quite a backlash from my account of  the discussions we’ve been having about sex.   I think the dust has finally settled and   it’s safe to return to talk about the exciting world of real estate.  But,  I want to be careful that  this doesn’t become the equivalent of one of those family updates some our friends and acquaintances send out around Christmas time.  (Although now, with Facebook, etc.  those are probably obselete and we can now know about the last toothbrushing and bowel movement our ‘friends’ are experiencing….all the time).   Anyway, if you find this recount boring and uninteresting, it’s your obligation to let me know.  Remember, we’re in this together.  I can always write about something else.

Well, things have changed in the office.  Luap’s wife, Nire,  has come to work here.  We love Nire but the office dynamics have been so finely tuned over a period of years that even the slightest change can create havoc.  And this is no small change.  How we will adapt, especially Luap, will be interesting to see.  A man and his wife spending that much time together!?  I half expect that  groups of anthropologists and social scientists will descend on the office as if we are some recently discovered aboriginal tribe in the rain forest.

Knarf,  who apparently doesn’t realize how old he is,   recently got back from a solo cross country  trip in his “way-post-midlife-crisis-Miata convertible” (this is just crying out for a mnemonic device).   Knarf is our “tech” guy.  During his absence, we were forced to return  to using our familiar and trusty  abacuses .  With his return, things have returned to normal and our conversations routinely include words like “bytes”, “pixels”, “jpegs” and “what’s for lunch?”

But the biggest news here is that for reasons that are even more boring than this report, my office needs to change its name.  Our conversations about sexual preferences have  been replaced by talk about logos, website addresses and business  names.  You can’t imagine how wearing  this is on me.  

 The office is run almost like a democracy (this is akin to being almost  pregnant), so we try to make decisions by consensus.  As a result there have been endless discussions regarding our new name.  One of the possibilities that was floated was General Motors Realty.   Because I’m a news junkie, I was quick to point out that GM is still in business and  would probably want to continue using that name.   So, we batted around a number of other candidate’s.  And then , it hit me.  Most of the folks working here are gentile. Why not a name that would trade on that aspect?  Say, “Goys ‘R Us”.  That’s it!   “Goys ‘R  Us Realty”.   How perfect is that?!


11 Responses to ““Is This Any Way to Run An Airline?””

  1. jackie Says:

    Knarp, Luap, Nire??? Are you kidding me? And you’re looking for a new name for the firm? Look no further.

    • ironicman Says:

      jackie…thanks for the comment. i’m not sure how far back you’ve gone in my blog, but these are pseudonyms to protect the identity (read: ytitnedi) of the people in my office. if i’m being too literal in my reading of your comment, forgive me.

  2. Htebazile Says:

    According to godaddy.com, goysrus.com is already taken! But goysrusbrooklyn.com is still available. Has a nice ring to it. I’ll tell our logo guy to mull it over.


  3. bob Says:

    speaking of anyway to run an airline…How ’bout the news about that Continental flight–really wasn’t all that unusual for airline crew…It’s called dead heading.

  4. Marguerite Says:

    Oy Vey!!

  5. Claire Says:

    I like the idea of us (your followers) being able to make requests…like calling out topics to an improv performer…hey, Neil, write something funny about….I have to think about this…actually, seems to me I’ve been giving you a bunch of suggestions lately…a public list will be forthcoming!

    • ironicman Says:

      i think i either mis-spoke or you misunderstood. the suggestion box is only if you’re bored, uninterested or unmoved. the blog is not a free-for all.
      i want to retain artistic control as best i can. of course, if you want to give me suggestions in private, i would welcome those and more than likely claim them as my own. cest la guerre.

  6. Jane Says:

    Syog R. Su Realty

    필 요도 syog 쓰에

    (Korean characters for your awning)

    • ironicman Says:

      jane….i was wondering when you were going to chime in. i like your idea. just have to hold a mirror up and now i’ve included two importnat groups in the name. have you considered a career in marketing?

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